ADVICE FOR THOSE APPLYING TO UNIVERSITY:

Although your A Level results are important to some extent, I implore you to never underestimate the impact of a good personal statement - from my experience its importance far exceeded my results in helping me achieve the offers I did.

My attendance at 6th Form was 42%, I had no work experience - in the placement we were supposed to go on in 6th form I just took the opportunity to stay in bed all week, and because of my low attendance my predicted grades were low to say the least... But much to Ms Curtis's annoyance and disbelief - she literally accused me of lying until she went on her computer and checked for herself - I received an unconditional offer from all five universities I applied to, and I firmly believe this is purely down to my personal statement.

Anyway, I just thought I'd give you a few tips on how to write a really eye catching personal statement.

1. HAVE A THESAURUS BY YOUR SIDE AT ALL TIMES. NOTHING IS MORE PLEASURABLE TO READ THAN A PIECE OF WRITING WITH AN ELABORATE USE OF VOCABULARY.

INTRODUCTION
Do an X Factor. Immediately bring in an emotive topic which is gonna really grab their attention - no, I don't mean "My entire family has died in a mysterious gardening accident, my house has burnt down and all I have left is the paper I'm writing on. PLEASE offer me a place!", I mean start talking about a certain event/inspiring person/discovery/social issue/etc which is widely known in your field as significantly impacting the development of the subject of your chosen course. EXAMPLE (I was applying for a journalism course): in my introduction, I discussed remembering the tragedy of 9/11 as a child and how it went on to fuse my interest in journalism but how in the grand scheme of things it changed journalism forever - journalists were not  there at the scene writing notes on the events as it happened; they caught the second plane crashing into the world trade centre on camera! ...was it necessary or particularly relevant to bring up 9/11 in my introduction? No, but it was emotive, captivating and immediately stood me out from the crowd.

Here's some more course specific examples of things to discuss in your introduction:
POLITICS/SOCIOLOGY: Martin Luther King Jr, Enoch Powell, apartheid, Emmeline Pankhurst, IRA, Andover workhouse scandal, Minging Thatcher, the Iraq war, sinking of the Belgrano, JFK, Stephen Lawrence, etc.
SCIENCES: Edward Jenner, forensic evidence pointing towards O. J. Simpson, the cervical cancer jab, 9/11 (Can fire melt steel beams?!), Science vs Religion, DNA - even Jeremy Kyle!
SPORTS: Hillsborough disaster, FIFA scandal, Caitlyn Jenner, steroid use, Paula Radcliffe weeing herself in the marathon to prevent herself from falling behind!
MUSIC: The assassination of John Lennon, the Buddy Holly plane crash, Woodstock Festival, the death of Amy Winehouse, the demonization of Courtney Love in the media, Lady Gaga being the product of Andy Warhol's commercialisation of popular culture, Beatlemania, the popularity of ecstasy use in the rave scene, the effect Britpop had on the rising popularity of Tony Blair, rock against racism, etc.

Can't think of more examples but there's a heads up.

2. WORK EXPERIENCE & YOUR STUDIES. Teachers will tell you this is the most important part, I beg to differ. Like I say, I had none but if you do have some, now's the time to cough up. If you have experience in the field, be sure to explain how it furthered your knowledge on the practical and theoretical side to the subject. This is where you should also discuss the subjects you have been studying at A Level, go into brief detail about the projects and assessments you've been completing, what skills you've gained from doing them and how you can apply these to what is expected from you in the course you are wishing to study.

3. PERSONAL SKILLS AND INTERESTS.
REALLY big yourself up - don't make it sound like you're asking for a place at their university, let them know how grateful they should be that you even applied there and how lucky they'd be to have you. I'm not telling you to lie but you can certainly allow for some poetic license to some extent... For example, where I could've truthfully said "I'm lazy, disinterested and a bit of a wreckhead", what I probably said was something more like "I'm a determined, motivated girl who has no imperfections... Other than that I am an absolute perfectionist"... You get the gist? Also, only bring up hobbies and interests if you can use them to your advantage and continue making it look like the sun shines out of your arse. Don't say 'my main hobbies include drinking vodka and smoking da ganja', amateur mistake that one.

4. CONCLUSION. Right, now this really has to be the climax of all climaxes. Link back to the initial emotive issue you discussed in your introduction, tie it up and turn it into the boldest statement you've ever made in your life. Make it a social issue, a media issue, a race issue, a religion issue, a gender issue, ANY issue, just ensure you've addressed an idea that is really gonna grab the reader's attention, leave an ominous taste in their mouth but most importantly, make YOU stand out from all of the other applicants and  consolidate your place at each university you apply to.

5. READ, REREAD AND REREAD.
Check for any typos, spelling mistakes and poor grammar.

GOOD LUCK!
And remember: if an idiotic, foolish imbecile like me can get into uni then YOU can too. Hope anyone who reads this finds it helpful!

GOODBYE RASEN: Poem for Doomed Youth!

AUTHORS NOTE: I briefly had a dream that I was reading out a Patti Smith poem in the market place where I live and I immediately woke up and wrote this poem. It just documents my grief for the loss of the town - it's always been a shithole but it was our shithole; there was community. Everyone used to look out for each other, now they COMPETE with each other. Anyway here it is, I hope it doesn't burn your ears/eyes too much!

Goodbye Rasen...

Goodbye to the rats infested with poison

To the thieves, the squealers and small time dealers

The swindlers, minglers and bicycle pinchers

So long to the scrap man who just wants your boiler

So long to the dickhead in a Citroen with a spoiler

Farewell to the zombies leaving town for much further

Taking stolen goods to Lincoln cash converters

To the croakers in line outside boots at noon,

Sticking to the script or returning to the spoon

Goodbye Rasen, hello new build estates

Goodbye Rasen, disappearing at such a rate

See ya later to the bitches who are not as they seem

To the snitches who grass to keep their own asses clean

To the pisshead stumbling from The Chase in the rain

To the testosterone fueled anger of steroids and cocaine

Sleep well to the good ones we lost along the way

Hold tight to the others who just seemed to lose their way

To the faces who survived and who will always be around,

The wide eyed eccentrics who belong in this town

Goodbye Rasen, it's the end of an era

Goodbye Rasen, it's never been clearer

So long to the pretense of the instagram goddess

Spending more time in cubicles not being so modest

To the sniffers who thrive off of feeling supreme

A false sense of superiority to replace a low self esteem

Goodbye Rasen, it was worth a try

Goodbye Rasen, you put the good in goodbye

PUNK IS DEAD ...but 2015 is the year of the resurrection.

EVERYBODY, LISTEN UP: No matter how socially inclusive the Tories present themselves as being, they are increasing tuition fees and getting rid of maintenance grants for students from low income households because they want education to only be available to the rich.

Why would David Cameron - our clean cut, well spoken, fresh faced prime minister - who apparently wants to improve the country for 'all' us, possibly want further education to be less and less accessible to the poor? Well, consider this; when the poor are educated to a point where they're made aware of the injustice of barbaric conservative policies which exclusively affect the poor, disabled, ethnic minorities, travelers, teachers, laborers, trade unions, single mothers, health care workers, students, pensioners, mentally ill, immigrants and basically anyone who isn't rich, white, and male, that's when these students typically start identifying as left wing and probably being extremely vocal about it too. Unsurprisingly this pisses Tories off; students who adopt a socialist - and often non conformist - mindset, comes with the eagerness to recruit others to the left of the political spectrum by participating in protests and riots in an attempt to highlight the well known fact - though one that the majority of the public would obviously currently prefer to ignore - that every Tory policy is carefully crafted to reinforce the class system by making the rich richer at the expense of the most vulnerable people in our society.

Children of the elite, however, massively outnumber those from lower income families who go on to study at university. Unsurprisingly though, it is mostly these students who eventually thoroughly appreciate the Tory party ethos and, in the interest of only themselves, will be more than willing to support, advocate and perpetuate the social pecking order to firmly keep their position in the ruling class. Not too many years ago it would have been unheard of for young people to vote Tory but now it seems those days are over; we are now living in a generation made up of second wave of yuppies - a direct product of having parents who’ve repeated the damaging phrase “There’s no such thing as society!”. It’s 2015 and the majority of the population voted for the outdated, reactionary, irrational, austerity-heavy, cold hearted conservative party… what the fuck, man? I refuse to believe that British youth have unanimously chosen money over morality, at this point I can only imagine that young people are not fully aware of how the conservatives show total disregard for the youth, despite how status driven the conservatives present themselves. Young Tory voters need to understand the consequences the most vulnerable people in this society have to suffer as a result of their actions. As a result of David Cameron’s policies, 4.7 million children in the UK are expected to be living in poverty by 2020. This is the man who can watch a defenseless animal be torn to shreds by a pack of dogs and call it 'sport', a man who campaigned for the execution of Nelson Mandela in the 1980s, a man who repeatedly refuses to investigate mass tax evasion by big businesses like HSBC, Google, Starbucks, Tesco etc etc - the real criminals whose paid taxes could make a genuine difference to the living standards of the average people, a man who demonises immigrants and benefit claimants in order to cover up his lack of interest in persecuting tax avoiders, a man who himself is guilty of having offshore bank accounts to avoid paying inheritance tax to the very country he is running.... But more bizarrely, the man that YOU voted for to be our prime minister.

What's worse is that this has been a tactic used by the party since their formation, so why are so many people still being so complacent and not educating themselves on things that affect them so directly? If you don't want to take on the debt that university entails then teach yourselves the ways of the world; in this day and age all the information you need is right at your fingertips - read up on austerity, tax fraud, the war in Iraq, LGBT rights, racism, fascism but ultimately make sure you are completely aware of the underlying inhumanity that is the driving force behind parties like The Conservatives, UKIP and the BNP. Wise up. Educate yourselves, it is what the powers that be are most afraid of - a generation of educated revolutionaries who've grown up immersed in the injustice of conservatism thus having the passion and knowledge to demand - dare I say it! - reform!

The aftermath of punk and it's ethos was officially pronounced dead in 1997 when Tony Blair, our apparent saviour from over a decade of Tory hell - 10 of those years being brutally governed by Thatcher, the epitome of tyranny. It's impact on not only music but on culture too is indisputable; punk was the beacon of hope that reminded the world that each and everyone of us has a voice that can be used to make a difference. We can fight corruption and we can fight austerity. Punk was rendered obsolete in 1997 but it's needed now more than ever. The tories might have had their talons firmly gripped in the 2015 election but come 2020, I will not be prepared for another Tory prime minister to be elected. So fasten your seatbelts folks because we've got a bumpy ride ahead of us for the next five years but have hope, change is on the horizon.

So, it's time. In years to come when your grandchildren ask you what part you played in reforming social inequalities and fighting the war against austerity, what is your answer going to be? Are you ready to join the movement or are you going to continue being complacent and ignoring the unjust nature of a conservative rule?

Introducing operation: wise up!

P.S. Vote Jeremy Corbyn for Labour party leader.

Iconic Sleeves

An album cover in particular whose infamous legacy almost exceeeds the recognition for the actual art is Never Mind The Bollocks Here's The Sex Pistols. The controversy surrounding it's release was pitiful. London police visited the record company's store branches and told them that if they continued to display images of the cover in their windows then they would face prosecution for indecency under the 1899 Indecent Advertisements Act. Meanwhile advertisements for Never Mind the Bollocksappearing in music papers attempted to politicize the issue, showing newspaper headlines about Sex Pistols controversies that were underlined with the message 
"THE ALBUM WILL LAST. THE SLEEVE MAY NOT."


The obscenity case was heard at Nottingham Magistrates' Court on 24 November. When the overseeing magistrate inquired about his line of questioning, the barrister stated that a double-standard was apparently at play and that "bollocks" was only considered obscene when it appeared on the cover of a Sex Pistols album. The prosecutor conducted his cross-examination "as if the album itself, and not its lurid visage, was on trial for indecency". The chairman of the hearing was forced to conclude:

"Much as my colleagues and I wholeheartedly deplore the vulgar exploitation of the worst instincts of human nature for the purchases of commercial profits by both you and your company, we must reluctantly find you not guilty of each of the four charges."

Initially, Nirvana's Nevermind was planned to be named Sheep - an inside joke Cobain created directed towards the people he expected to buy the record. He wrote a fake advertisement for Sheep in his journal that read "Because you want to not; because everyone else is." As recording sessions for the album were completed, Cobain grew tired of the title and suggested that the new album be named Nevermind. Kurt liked the title because it was a metaphor for his attitude on life and because it was grammatically incorrect - which could also be seen as metaphorically representing their raw, unrefined sound.

The Nevermind album cover shows a baby boy, alone underwater with a US dollar bill on a fishhook just out of his reach. The whole image promotes the idea that the entire human race is born with preconceived ideas that allow for the running of a capitalist society - even as innocent, virtuous babies we know to gravitate towards money. According to Cobain, he conceived the idea while watching a television program onwater births with Dave Grohl. Cobain mentioned it to their art directorRobert Fisher who then sent a photographer to a pool for babies to take pictures. Five shots resulted and the band settled on the image of athree-month-old infant named Spencer Elden. However, there was some concern because Elden's penis was visible in the image. Geffen prepared an alternate cover without the penis - as they were afraid that it would offend people - but retracted the changes when Cobain made it clear that the only compromise he would accept was a sticker covering the penis that would say, "If you're offended by this, you must be a closet paedophile."

The cover art for Is This features a photograph of a woman's nude bottom and hip, with a leather-gloved hand suggestively resting on it. The sleeve has often been seen as a reference to Smell the Glove - the name of a fictional album by the mock heavy-metal band Spinal Tap in the mockumentary film This Is Spinal Tap. The film was so ironicaly accurate about the lives of rockstars that people such as Jimmy Page, Robert Plant, Jerry Cantrell, Dee Snider and Ozzy Osbourne all reported that they could perfectly relate to the fictional band. Singer, Tom Waitsclaimed he cried upon viewing it and Eddie Van Halen claimed that "Everything in that movie had happened to me".

In the mockumentary, the original cover of Smell The Glove, according to recording company representative Bobbi Fleckmann featured "a greased, naked woman on all fours with a dog collararound her neck and a leash, and a man's arm extended out...holding on to the leash and pushing a black glove in her face to sniff it." Fleckmann suggests that the cover is sexist, leadingband member Nigel Tufnel to wonder, "what's wrong with being sexy?". The production company, Polymer Records, ultimately refused to release the cover because of pressure from retailers such as Sears and Kmart and gave the album a solid black cover instead. The cover for Is This It was included in the book The Greatest Album Covers of All Time, in which Grant Scott,concluded, "It’s either a stylish or graphically strong cover or a sexist Smell the Glove travesty." Ironically, The Strokes album cover also created a similar amount of controversy. Although British retail chains HMV and Woolworths objected to the photograph's controversial nature, they stocked the album without amendment.
Alike Nirvana, The Strokes deliberately left out the grammatically correct question mark from the album title because aesthetically, "it did not look right". For the American market and the October 2001 release, the cover art of Is This It was changed to a psychedelic photograph of subatomic particle tracks in a bubble chamber. According to the band's manager, frontman Julian Casablancas phoned him before the Japan and Europe release and said, "I found something even cooler than the a** picture." Later though, the band admitted that they changed the US cover in fear of receiving a 'Smell The Glove' reaction from America's conservative retail industry.

ARTIST PROFILE: J-Wok

A slight deviation from the indie genre but relevant nonetheless...

https://soundcloud.com/jakewatkinson-1 

Everyone follow this geezer on Soundcloud. He’s into really good indie music but also creates some bloody amazing dn’b mixes. He’s fecking ace and could really do with some more support/recognition.... he's gonna go places.

Not to mention he’s got a shithot beard and a heart of gold, can’t go wrong!

Some notable tracks include; 

And his first to be released on 5howtime Music...

"Drum and Bass from the land of its origins: Britain (UK).

The young producer from Lincolnshire amazes with his atmospheric, piano-based tracks blended with melancholic vocals. But J-Wok offers a big variety of dnb- music in his repertoire. From melancholic chill tracks to rough club bangers. Even neurofunk and remixes and bootlegs. But don’t let us waste your time. Check it out yourself:

You can reach him through this links:

• SoundCloud
• YouTube
• FaceBook" - http://www.liquidaudionetwork.com/announcement/artist-j-wok/